Things have changed..

Its already the second week of school and it has been 2 weeks since she left. well, i can sense that things have definitely changed since then. Firstly, i hardly call her nowadays, therefore no more need to head down to little india to get calling cards so often ( i can get them cheaper there. =p). Its weird that i nv got sick and tired of talking on the phone with her almost every other day for the past few months. I felt like a kindergarten kid who was so in love with a girl that he would save money just to buy the girl he likes her fav candy everyday. Well i still am really drawn to her..its just different. I now feel like the kid who wants to buy her candy everyday but he knows she's getting bored of it. I really miss every single bit of the conversations, from the frequent burps, different subjects and topics which we are so open to each other, to the kisses exchanged over the phone before hanging up. It sucks to know that someone has taken my place. Secondly, i think we've kind of drifted a bit, not as close as what we were before but we're still close. The reason being said first, we hardly talk on the phone anymore. I feel that she has found someone who's over there in melbourne who can just be there for her, someone who shares similar characteristics, thoughts and habits like hers. Yes, i'm very sure they do talk on the phone every other day, meet during the weekends and maybe give her the attention she needs. You readers must be thinking that i'm jealous..."YAR DUH?". If not why the hell would i be pouring my heart and blogging abt this. Despite the feeling of insecurity living in me, another side tells me that i can do NOTHING about this. True. Cos i'm here and she's there and we are kinda on a break. Although she claims its temporary,we're still on a break..which means she can do whatever and wants and vice versa. However,yes, we still do love each other. Ironic isnt it? Exchanging those 3 special words feels somehow a lil weird now, BUT i do love her very much! Its hard to keep it inside and get choked. I just dont know if she feels the same for the other guy whom she's really close with. Well maybe she's drawing closer to him. Am i thinking too much? If u think i am..i'm telling u I CANT HELP IT! Its the other way round now, i'm spending less time with her on the phone and vice versa. I dont wanna lose her to someone else. =( Lastly, she has changed. She's getting more hardcore and i dont want her to..thats all i have to say.

Rugby season's starting in a week, dont think i'll get to play this season but i'll def work my way up to play next season. =) I need to work out and build up mass..i'm too small to be in the forward pack. The injuries, although minor ones, are showing signs that i'm jus weak. =( I'm beginning to feel a lil left out in sch. I've failed 2 papers so far and i'll probably fail more. I was the only one in class..maybe the only one in the whole intake who failed catering science. 78! Wtf?! Its really embarrassing...my gpa is already so low. Sigh, i really need to make somthing out of this semester. GOD I NEED YOU! S.O.S!!